It's been a 3 steps forward, 2.75 steps back kind of week with Jiushu...and with a few of my other kids, actually. Hummus Girl bit...bit...like, where blood is drawn...her older brother, known here from now on as The Absent-Minded Professor. And Princess Firecracker remains her usual self, wildly fluctuating between so-sweet-I-want-to-eat-her and a wee bit monstrous. What in the world is happening here?!?
With regards to Jiushu, I've been reaching out for advice, specifically about his food issues, and have received loads of suggestions and encouragement from been-there-done-that parents. It's extremely comforting to know that behavior and emotions which seem, quite honestly, so bizarre and foreign to me are not at all abnormal in internationally adopted children. One wise gal wrote this to me:
Our daughter struggled so much - I learned the hard way that I needed to lower my expectations with her. Some things I didn't realize even were expectations - like the eating issues, but because I also have bio kiddos - I knew what a 17 month old was "supposed" to do...that just isn't important in the grand scheme of things. So try to throw the developmental milestones out the window, and parent your sweet little guy where he is emotionally - home with you for 3 months - so emotionally he is like a 3 month old baby.Hmmm. It's true. In many ways he really is. OK. So...patience. Endurance. Lowered expectations. More naps? Drawing great bucketfuls of wisdom from my wise Father. And a ginormous hot fudge sundae is not out of the question.
In the mean time, I'll keep using my highest, sing-songiest voice ever--'cause it totally convinces me that I can postpone the self-lobotomy 'til another day!!!--and I'll keep replenishing the circular "toasted whole grain oat cereal." Heaven help us if I should happen to run out.
3 comments:
Hang in there girl! :) I've heard the same advice and I really believe it's true. :) You still have high expectations, just different based on the child. :)
Yay, I named hummus girl!! I was reading as though it was firecracker - then I figured out it was HUMMUS GIRL! Are you kidding me???? Wow!!!
Maybe j needs a name too... although I just think of his as shu most of the time. Absent minded prof is good too! Or chess champ...
Thanx for the fb msg.
Nice and slow. And maybe firecracker can just sit under the table to eat them when shu tosses those circle oats... so she can keep her fingers out of nanners...
Heart hugs!
Aren't Saturdays bliss? What a difference it makes having a partner on hand to help with the children. :)
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